Doesn't make sense

I have decided that money is from the Devil! It seems to be the main stress of my household and it gets in the way of everything!

Sorry, I can't go out to eat with you guys tonight because I don't have money.
I wish I could but I can't buy a plane ticket home because I have no money.
Dang it, I can't do that thing that you all wanted to do when you wanted to do it because...well you get my point!

But the biggest thing I wonder despite all my complaining is...How are people making it these days? and how are people buying huge mansions and 6 Bentleys with the way this economy is? It just doesn't make sense. But seriously, how are people surviving and has anyone noticing that some are barely surviving?

Let me tell you a little story that took place, oh about 3 days ago, in a big city called Atlanta. I was downtown and Safehouse with a few friends learning more about the organization when I walked outside the building and saw a remarkably sad site. People among people standing in line for food. All ages...elderly, teenagers kids...my heart broke. There had to be hundreds of them forming a semi single file line in order to get a meal that evening.

There I was thinking back to the complaints I had about not being able to eat out at Chili's that day because I was short on cash, when these people stood in front of me without the option of going anywhere for food that required cash. They had none!

Now you're probably saying to yourself, "well those people need to get a job and make money like the rest of us!" and my response to you is "they've tired." Some of them really have. They are broken, living on the streets because they lost their job, couldn't find work in this economy and had to move their families onto the streets because they were evicted from their homes. And you know what, you can't get a job without an address. Don't believe me...try to!!!

I learned so much Tuesday. Stuff that is etched in my brain and weighing heavy on my heart! Time for me to quit complaining about money because despite the fact they I may not be able to have dinner out for a few days, I , unlike some will get a paycheck and will be able to purchase the things I need. I don't have it hard like some!

My prayer is for Jesus to make me aware. To give me the opportunity to give with what I have to those who need more than a hand out, they need a hand to hold on to. Someone to walk with them and help instead of walking pass them and judging!

cuteness...tiny tom style

I think these are the cutest little things ever and you can bet that my little kid will have a pair...if these are still around when I finally have kids!

Do you want a pair for your kid or maybe for yourself? Then go get you a pair!!!

They're only a click away! TOMS

I got dibs on the Poe Toms :)

Tid Bits of goodness

I love when God steps in and sends me a little reminders that trials will come but He has everything under control...and these little tid bits of goodness came to my email inbox so I know he was anxious to speak with me :)

I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.

~ John 16:33, NLT

Pile your troubles on God's shoulders--
he'll carry your load, he'll help you out.

Psalm 55:22 (The Message)

Stress reliever for life

What some of you may or may not know is I hide a lot... a lot of feelings, my emotions and my stress. Those of you who are close to me and have known me for years know this but for those of you who are just getting to know me, this is something I try really hard to cover up. I want to be that strong, independent girl who can do everything by herself...but the truth is I can't and never will be able to. I am learning slowly that sometimes it's better to share your emotions, to let your fears and disappoints trickle out because in reality, there are people out there just like me who bottle it up and spend nights in tears instead of letting go.

Sometimes life is painful and completely confusing.I get challenged with tough questions and decisions. Just like Jeff Henderson has been talking about, I'm in the waiting room and I'm anxiously awaiting my way out. It's not fun and most of time I find myself in a state lonliness and anxiousness. Don't to worry about tomorrow... that's what the Bible teaches. Trust god, pray hard, have faith in His will and seek first the kingdom. I try so hard but I always fall back into this state of defeat and fear that my day will never come.

I'm tired of doing that! Tired of fearing...tired of doubting...tired, just plain tired! So if you see me and I'm not acting quite right, make me tell what's wrong!

I know all that was quite heavy...so I will jump to a lighter note.

Come close and I will tell you a little secret ...one of my stress relievers is quite fascinating! When I need to relax and unwind I turn to my little friends, the Grow Capsules.

I have loved these since I was little. Here's how it's done:

Drop the capsules in a glass of hot water

And wait...waiting could take up to 5 minutes so this is more of a patience teaching tool than a stress reliever :)

Capsules will begin to take shape.

When they're done, you have new friends:)

Love it!

Worry

Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.

~ Philippians 4:6, NLT

The sun sets over the sea

I spent the past five days at a little place I call home! Not my home home but my second home. The place where I met Jesus and he began teaching the beauty of all the things around me. The serenity that comes with a beautiful sunset or the light sea breeze that blows across your face. This place is a little magical and some of us call it bubble because when you're there, troubles seen so distant and stress just melts away. This place is called Caswell.

If you've known my for a while then you know how much this place means to me, to my well being and just the effect it has on my heart and soul. I enter that gates and I am immediately happy! It's where my smiles are big and laughter is loud. It causes me to act a little like a child but in a mature type of way:)

It's a place where the sun rises over the river and the sun sets over the sea. Where khaki and blue make sense for daily attire and sitting on Little Pier can make everything better!

I had a hard time coming home to Atlanta, not because I don't love it here... it's just, the bond I have with my friends and family in NC is hard to drive away from. It's very difficult to leave the ones you love especially when you don't really know when you'll get to see them again:( I have a hard time with that.

I will go back soon and I embrace every second! One NC, I will come back to you and it will be glorious:)

Lately, I've been thinkin' about You
And lately, I've been dreaming about You
And lately, I can't get You out of my head
Get You out of my head

There's something about the ocean
Makes me rise up and praise
There's something about the heavens
Makes me stand in awe again
There's something about the sunrise
Reminds me of Your faithfulness
There's something about the ocean (Your presence)
And I'm lost in love again

I'll sing until I sense a smile
Upon Your great and lovely face
Until I know Your glory's in this place
Your glory's in this place (yeah-yeah)

The Domino Effect!

Have you ever played the game Domino?

If you said yes, then you know that when you cause one domino to fall, it cause a "ripple effect" meaning it effects the way the other dominos react ... they fall as well.

What if you took that example and turned into an effect with life, with how you share the Gospel, with the way you treat people, with loving on people who may have never felt that love before?

You know what I think ... I think it would look like Jesus!

Tonight was a challenge. But not in the way you may think. It wasn't a challenge meaning it was difficult, it was a challenge meaning I gave a vision that I hope and pray will catch on. An idea that stems from what Jesus taught us to do. He taught us to go out and love. He taught us serve and place ourselves below others in order to do so. He taught us that life is about reaching those who need to reached. And you want to hear something funny...Most people don't know that they're lost until they realize what they have been missing!

So my challenge is to go out, speak out, love on, care for and do to others what we hope people will do unto us. Walk on campus and see the opportunities to witness and to influence those people who no one else ever thought to share with. Impact those people in the restaurants and grocery stores they may have never stepped foot in a church. The possibilities are endless and the time can sometimes be few so we have to start today!

Right now, July 21, 2009... I challenge you to create a Domino Effect. Pour into someone and see the effects it will have on them pouring into someone else. Imagine, just imagine what will happen when you ... yes YOU ... share the love of Jesus Christ?! BIG things ... that's what will happen!!!

Pass the domino and watch the ripple effect take place :)

To my Caswell 2009 ladies, leave a comment the start of your domino story and remember to pass it along to those who are being impacted! To read more stories visit www.passthedomino.com

One Full Day

I drove through the gates and it's like I never left!

The air still blows gently and sticky with that sea salt smell. Hogie still mans the gate and tells he loves me. The pool is still on the right and the Yam's house is still the first place I stop. Memories of my summer staff days immediately fill my head and the excitement of making more memories this week is overwhelming in a fantastic way.

I'm at Caswell...I've been here for a full day and I'm not gonna lie, I may not leave!

International Justice Day

What would you stand up for?

What would you speak out for?

What would you fight for?

Those are all good questions, and yes I know each question ends with a preposition but that's not the point right now! Watch this video and then finish reading the rest of this blog...

International Justice Day

I don't know about you but that video speaks powerful words to me. Words that aren't thought about in OUR regular routine but for some people in this world these words are dealt with every day...

Walking miles for water, unclean water that will harm their bodies.
Children working instead of playing and learning.
Being beaten because your color isn't the same as the person standing next to you.
Being sold for sex by your father or family member.
Deciding whether to pay for food or medicine. And for most, not having the medicine accessible to them.

...this is happening right NOW. As you and I sit here, sipping on our Starbucks or wrapped up on sofas, people are suffering! I can't wrap my mind around the thought of not doing anything about this. I can't grasp the thought of sitting back and hearing these stories over and over. It's time to do something about it.

Will you stand up for them?

Will you speak out for them?

Will you fight for them?


*click the image to find out how you can help!

Oak Island...I'm coming!

I am now counting down hours till I make my way down to the coast of North Carolina! I am starting to get antsy and I really wish I wasn't sitting at this desk at this very moment. I want to be on the road...on way may...outta here!

I have all these wonderful thoughts running through my head about the friends I'm going to see, the events I get to partake in and all the memories I'm going to remember as I drive across that bridge and see that tri-colored lighthouse.

Oak Island, I have missed you and I am overjoyed at the fact that I will be spending 6 days with you. We will definitely re-kindle our relationship!

Lemony sweet!

Sometimes life throws you lemons but sometimes it throws you cupcakes :)

Life has a funny way of surprising you when you least expect it! Late last week, I was dealing with a situation, one that was frustrating and left me hurt. I've been lied to a few too many times in my life, but this one shouldn't have happened and I let it! Betrayal and resentment filled my heart and mind. But you know what...even though one part of my life was sour because of lemons being thrown, the other side was sweet. The part of me that has learned to forgive and to love even when it's hard took over. My faith, my friendships, my desires and my exciting opportunities allowed me to take those lemons, those sour thoughts and make lemon cupcakes...with white frosting of course!

There's no point in being a sour patch kid!

Faith in the Sandbox

Just a video to show one of the many reasons why God is real and his people are impacting this world!

makes me happy

Hanging out with my friends makes me happy!!!

That's all I have to say today :)

Can we say Opera...

All dressed in black and ready to dance the night away!

All smiles and all smoke

We look very sneaky

This our street picture! Yep, the night was still young

I love weekend nights with this bunch :)

To Know your Name...

I woke up with a new feeling...way better than last night's :)

There is a song I found myself singing in the shower this morning – “To know Your name“, by Hillsong United. There’s something about the lyrics to this song that speaks to me all the time. There are specific lines in this song that minister to my core, while the Lord walks with me through this season – a very long season, but I find it to be almost over and I’m awaiting the next one. I find myself singing this song to God at random hours of the day & night and it’s amazing to feel Him smiling over me – it’s actually tangible.

“Your grace has overwhelmed my brokenness” – this is simply amazing – - in our broken state, the Lord’s grace abounds in ways that don’t make sense to the carnal mind. It’s as though we don’t feel the symptoms of brokenness, even when we’re walking in the season of emptying out, because the Lord has medicated us with His amazing grace. I think that’s an awesome way to look at this season I’m in now – I no longer feel the awful symptoms of brokenness even though I do know I am still in the season – that has not changed, but what has changed – is the acceptance & realization of my Jesus’ grace.

“The precious blood of Jesus Christ redeems, forgiven I’m alive, restored. Set free” – I think this line still makes my eyes water, because it’s unbelievable that through the blood of my Jesus, my life is completely redeemed and renewed. Nothing about my life can or ever will be the same because the blood of Jesus has taken its place in my awkwardly shaped life. Like the lyrics say, his life was truly precious on earth and yet people de-valued Him, sadly they still do..

I can say one thing, when people take the ice off of their beings and warm up to the concept that Christ’s life did not have to be taken away so harshly for our sake, only then will members of the Body step up to the plate and do what the Lord has been calling them to do since the beginning of time It’s this ice that has been numbing the mentality of Christians today – it does exactly to our Spiritual bodies as actual ice would do to the physical body. What does it do? When you apply ice to the body, it numbs the body from feeling the pain and suffering of the injury or damage that has previously occurred. In the same context, as the Lord’s Body – we have applied ice on our Spiritual bodies so that we would remain numb to the pain and suffering of our precious Jesus, our King Jesus. We can look at the scars and the bruises of the injury and talk about it, but we can’t feel it – so the lack of impact deems worthless to even talk about.

Every time we get a visual of the cross – tears should physically drop like rain, because we do not deserve eternity with Him, but yet it is freely given. We are forever in debt to Him – we took the loan from God, but Jesus paid the interest for us because there was no way we could afford it, make sense? I love the cross, it’s simply beautiful, even in the inhumanity of it. I do find myself thinking about it whenever I get time away from the busyness of the world – it realigns my thoughts, words, and actions.

I’ll leave you with the last few lines of the song.. And He took my place, knowing He´d be crucified. And You loved, You loved a people undeserving!

Be blessed.

To Jesus, my King Jesus..

The precious blood of Jesus Christ redeems,
Forgiven I´m alive, restored. Set free.
Your Majesty resides inside of me,
Forever I believe, forever I believe.
Arrested by your truth and righteousness,
Your grace has overwhelmed my brokenness.
Convicted by your spirit, led by your word,
Your love will never fail, your love will never fail.
I know you gave the world
Your only son for us
To know Your name
To live within the Saviour’s love
And He took my place
Knowing He´d be crucified
And You loved, You loved
A people undeserving!
-Hillsong, To know Your name

Mad night

It's amazing how your mood can change in an instant!

Praying that God will take away the angry thoughts... so I don't hurt someone, haha!

Saying good-bye

Tonight I had to say good bye to a new and precious friend! His name is Yusuke and I've only known him for about 3-4 months but what I have grasped from this amazing person is that he has a love for people and an contagious joy that fills the room when he enters. He laughs at all and will spend his time getting to know you no matter how long it takes.

Yusuke is about to embark on a new journey as he ventures to the big city of Seattle. He's gonna do great things there and I am so excited to hear what God does in this transition and new chapter of his life!

Please pray for Yusuke as he travels tomorrow and as he settles in to his new city and new life!

You will be buddy but remember we're all just a phone call and a plane ride away :)

Love

So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other.
Just as I have loved you, you should love each other.
Your love for one another will prove to the world that
you are my disciples.

John 13:34-35 (New Living Translation)

Full of Joy

Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again rejoice.

~ Phil. 4:4

Blessed by them

I am blessed... I tear up when I say that but it's true.

I have food to eat, warm blankets to sleep and one of the best communities ever. You see, I have this group of friends that not only bring grins to my face and laughter to my heart, they do more. They are there in the hard times. Beside me when I fall. But most importantly they engage in the adventures of living for God and they bless everything around them. I can't fully describe to you this group because for one they aren't all in the same state, zip code, GPS coordinate. They are scattered across this fine nation making a difference in lives of people who need it. They are sharing the love Christ through hugs, through smiles, through their actions, their giving, through their funds...you name it they are doing it!

I step back and look at all of them, and there are too many to count. But I think about what they're doing. For example, Megan is making a difference in New York. David and Jeremiah and teaching kids in Estonia. Lindsey is doing mission in New Zealand and through photography tells their story. Walker is blessing people through his knowledge and his humble and contagious spirit in Atlanta, giving out food and money to those in need. Kristen is giving her summer to lead girls into a relationship with Christ by teaching them through worship and events in North Carolina. I could keep listing but the bottom line is, these people are changing this nation one blessing at a time!

I am blessed to know these people and I thank God for them!!!

love you guys!

July 4th...2009

What an awesome 4th of July! Couldn't have asked for better...

Three of my favorite ladies at Twist.

Fireworks at Lenox Square.

Standing at the intersection of Lenox & Peachtree. Looks different without all that traffic!

Me and Walker :)

Happy Freedom day to everyone!

Crazy thoughts...

I believe that at 2 in the morning your thoughts start to get all jumbled up and crazy ideas pop up out of no where. Like, getting in your car and driving to Waffle House for some late night pancakes still in your pjs. I'm not even a huge fan of Waffle House but at this very moment I would actually consider it...WHAT?! Ideas of rearranging the living room so that it would become a little more symmetrical. Oh and the most recent thought in my head... dying my hair red and blue to celebrate the 4th tomorrow...

...I totally need to go to bed :)

Danger Zone

OK...the good news first! Cambi went to the vet today and they figured out what was making her sick, YAY! She has some antibiotics and she is on the road to recovery.

Now for the reason I am blogging today...I watched the movie Top Gun last night and I can't get the songs out of my head. I keep singing over and over, 'Highway to the Danger Zone...' I am seeing the planes take off and I actually dreamed about being on a military base last night. WHAT?!

You see this movie brings back a lot of old memories from college...some of my favorite memories. And more specifically, the movie reminds me of a special person that used to be big part of my life. He still is but only from a distance :(

So I dedicate this blog to him, the impact he has made on my life and the memories we shared. Praying that one day our paths will cross again!

Highway to the Danger